I think that’s how it is with life. You think you’re gonna get out of it and escape by pulling away, only to find yourself more constricted than ever.
If you really want to get free, you have to move inwards, closer to the center of things…
The best part of today was when I was walking down the street and a little girl got off of a school bus and screamed at the top of her lungs “I’M FREE!!!” I love her.
I don’t know if I’ll actually end up running marathons, at least in this year. I just need to envision a bigger dream that I can see myself in, with a tangible outcome or goal that I can work towards indefinitely. The same thing with yoga. It’d be cool to be an instructor one day. The human body is infinitely amazing and with our minds we can do quite literally anything, if not in this universe than maybe in the one across the street. We have legs and muscles to run and dance and move and stretch, but instead we’re prepared from the age of 5 onwards to sit at a desk for our whole lives. We have minds with an enormous, unfathomed potential to dream and create, but from the age of 5 onwards we’re taught what we’re supposed to think, and to define ourselves and our lives in concrete terms.
This rigidity creates so much conflict in a flexible universe that never ceases to change, grow, & expand. Where is there room for self-knowledge, in both body and soul? One philosophy that interests me is the idea that Creation exists for the Creator to know itself in every possible form. So everything, while entirely unique and individual, is entirely the same in it’s essence, and there’s no separation at all between essences, so anything you do to another living entity you are literally doing to yourself.
So if you work on improving yourself as much as possible, you are thereby helping the entire Whole. And only when you reach the top of the pyramid of human needs in the hierarchy— self-transcendence— you can help others to self-transcend, which is what I feel is the pinnacle of human existence.
I don’t think of it as much as a pyramid as I do a circle. The top is the same as the bottom, and so on into infinity. So I suppose in that sense, maybe enlightenment can be achieved through the refinement of our basic needs, like running.
Who knows, though? Everything’s just speculation, anyways. They say that there are concrete, 100% true, solid FACTS out there, but even those have been known to be changed with the gaining of further insight.
All I can do is be free and open. Let the chirping birds be enough to pierce my heart with pure joy; let my curiosity grow like budding twigs branching off of a limb; and let my lungs burn with appreciation for all of existence. <3
Horton my Cat told me this morning,
"I had a dream last night about travelling through a wormhole that led into your heart and out of your mind and took me to another layer in the fabric of universe. There’s so much out there to see. All of the stars are intertwined in ribbons of infinite cosmic love. All of your worries do not exist, and your spirit is glowing inside with the same light as those stars, and they are magnets pulling you home."
Once upon a time, long ago in a far away kingdom, there was a girl and it was her 21st birthday. She did not want to be a grown-up, so she had a mental breakdown.
Bon anniversaire a moi, it’s not even 11 yet and I’ve been pranked by the universe. No drinking, just going to meditate on the meaning of humility. LOL.